Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Just Don't Drop It

Ever wonder if a 94.5-inch long bike will fit in a 61.1-inch midget truck-bed?  Turns out it’s kinda’ like the old 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag. After you figure out all the geometry stuff, it does works pretty good for a one-man operation. All you have to do is ignore the legs bending and the thought that the cheap-ass hyd cylinder could blow at any time and it works fine. The truck told me it wants a set of air shocks for its birthday.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Buggie's New Shoes

Spied three bad-ass looking govment’ helicopters landing at the airport this morning. Really tight formation. No doubt they were military pilots. Probably some 3-letter agency here to bother the street gangs. Them guys drink a lot of coffee. Maybe I’ll run into them so I can have some fun with um’. Ever walk up to a stranger and ask if they’re a FBI agent? Try it sometime.

Well the filthy bike got a new pair of shoes. Fine Italian rubber. A nice shinny pair of them thar’ Pie-rel-ez’z. I run Pirelli’s on my Ironhead with no complaints. But that old bucket of cast-iron is a different ride than a modern computer between your legs. So now I need to figure out what psi I like. If I stuck with the OEM tires I would know that. But changing brands means I’ve got to experiment. The plan is to run Buggie at 38, 41 & 36 psi. See which one corners the best and leave it there. Oh yea, I just named the bike ‘Buggie’. Ran it today at 38 psi but couldn’t tell much. It was so damn windy you had to fight to stay in your lane. Guess I’ll have to repeat that part of the experiment. The work never ends.

Why ‘Buggie’? Well it’s always covered in bugs. I just can’t bring myself to wash it. There’s something about the artistry of Ma’ Nature that Man can’t duplicate. The delicate patterns and designs they make on chrome are not to be fooled with. It’s the way ‘She’ wanted it. It’s not nice to fool with Mother Nature. There’s a reason She had that bug fly into my eye. Don’t know what it is and it pissed me off. But there’s still a reason. Plus it’s a wheeled conveyance used to get from point A to point B. Sometimes it’ll even get you back again. That’s close enough to the definition of a buggie for me. Now I just need to look under the frame and see what sex it is.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Baby Needs New Shoes

The damn thing needs a new pair of shoes again! How does this keep happing? Its called living folks. Like going through a tiny mountain town at 3 AM and scaring the crap out of the young lady stocking the corner store you thought was closed. Not seeing the surveillance camera until after you pissed. Or the young lady in the window stocking the shelves trying to act as if she hadn’t heard the Harleys in the middle of nowhere and desperately trying to avoid eye contact.

Having someone whisper when you’re half asleep that there’s a coyote behind you trying to sniff you like a piece of meat. Hey, the desert’s the coyotes’ house. So I guess it’s his rules.

Being woke up by the Ride Across America bicycle folks at 12:30 AM doing a rider and equipment change with their RV’s. They were nice people and they fed us. So we let them live.

Starting to nod off behind a out of business gas station and noticing a Sheriffs’ car across the street in the shadows that wasn’t there when you parked. He left after about 10 minutes. Guess he hadn’t seen the video from the country store yet.

Riding the last 200 miles of a 1500-mile jaunt in 40-degree temps at 2 in the morning. No such thing as packing to much cold weather gear.

Maybe that’s how the tires keep wearing out. That and a bunch of those yummy 5-hour energy drinks.