Friday, April 8, 2011

Running Over Critters

Ok Wooley, you asked for it. Here’s the ponytail contest. There’s a catch, of course. There’s only one contestant and that’s me. So I win by default. I’ll take my winnings in cash please.

Heard on the radio this morning that I dude rolled a garbage truck down a 50ft drop-off. He’ll be fine. Broke a few bones but he’ll heal. The report said that he swerved to avoid a animal. That got me thinking about bikes and critters on the road. But first a rant to the guy driving that truck: Don’t get back in it! You don’t belong there. I’ve driven trucks for years. Not much anymore. More darn paperwork than anything else. Not sure if I consider that a career advancement or not. I’d really rather just work on the stuff. Screw the paperwork. But there’s a hard and fast rule in truck driving: You don’t swerve for critters, period. You’ve got two things working against you here. You’re vehicle is top heavy or you may be hauling a trailer. A fast swerve can have very bad results. Slow down if you can, but swerve or lock it up? Never! You can hit a moose or cow with a rig. The worst that will probably happen is the radiator into the engine. That’s a whole lot better than going off the road. Ain’t nothing like a big-ass solid front bumper.

I’ve got a hard and fast rule for my bike also: If it looks like it’ll go under my front bumper, I’m going over it. Bigger than that I’ll try and avoid it. If it is a moose or cow, well I guess that’s when you find out if you’re getting a pitchfork or wings. You’ve got to be very aware of what’s on the roads. We’ve got a butt load of ground squirrels around here. I’ve seen many riders get spooked by the little vermin. It’s not the vermin’s fault; it’s the riders’ fault for riding with their head up their ass and not being aware of their surroundings. When I’m on a back road that’s infested with little varmints I find it easier to keep a eye on them if I turn the tables and hunt them down. Birds gotta’ eat to ya’ know. They love flattened squirrel stakes. You barley feel them squash under your tires.

While we’re on the subject of trucks, everyone that’s ever driven had a favorite. Mine was the one I used for hauling construction equipment. And yes, I built it. The old girl was a 1965 KW W-900. 292 Cummins big cam. 4X4 brownie box with a twin screw rear. 4th overdrive she’d run 85. 1st double-under she’d pull a D8 through a marsh.

Somehow this got away from ponytails. Don’t matter though. I’ve got to go drink coffee and clean off my workbench. Poor Tramp needs some surgery in the morning. Her starters acting up. So we’ll see what $10 part we can replace that will save a $600 dealer repair bill.


IHG said...

Great Ponytail! Kind of has that Scorpian thing going on!

Lady Ridesalot said...

Nice rig! Nice ponytail too!

Speaking of starters? Got me one last week... $468.00! Cha-ching!
(I don't have the pleasure of living near Dr. Wrench)
Don't you want to move to Alabama? I'm sure me and my 'ol girl could keep you busy!

MeanDonnaJean said...

Mmmmmmmm hmmmmmm......that's some niiiiiiice tail ya got there, babe ;-)

KT Did said...

"Squirels, Nature's Little Speed Bumps". I saw that sticker on some bike at AZBW. Cracked me had a stuffed squirel on the front fender and one on the handlebars.
With all kidding aside, I agree with you... I5 in California gives out a few animals, and even though its hard, run over them. I think we are taught that in DMV & MSF too.

Arizona Harley Dude said...

Them ASPCA folks will be looking for you admitting you aren’t willing to kill yourself to preserve a critter. Me? I salute you for teaching the little bastards a lesson about gloating on the Geico commericials.

mq01 said...

im willing to bet that workbench didnt need to be cleaned, that it was already clean and ready to go :) hope tramps prob was trouble free, we gotta roadtrip to prep for :)

Willy D said...

IHG: Strange thing about it is that’s my astrological sign. Go figure.

Lady R: Every part in there is replaceable. All a dealer does anymore is replace assemblies, not repair the part. No money in it.

MDJ: The last time someone told me I’ve got a ‘niiiiiiice tail’ his name was Big Buba and the windows had bars on them.

KT: I believe I saw that bike on your last post.

AZHD: Yea well, give them and PITA my address. Tell them they’re invited to a barbeque. I’ll be cooking road-kill.

mq01: Just like cleaning off your desk. Push in off onto the floor. You’ll find it later.

No Name said...

Gotta agree on the stupidity of swerving in a truck to avoid hitting an animal. I've killed some critters in my time by not swerving.

On a related note, when you roll over a turtle they make a popping/crunching sound as if you just sat on a bag of potato chips.

WooleyBugger said...

Guess I'll have to post up a pic of my ponytail now.

Bullfrogs make a mighty loud POP! when you hit them.

Mr. Motorcycle said...

On an insurance side note weather riding in a car, truck or on a bike. If you swereve to miss an animal and go into the ditch, the damage you cause to your ride is considered collision and will raise your premiums. If you hit the animal, it is a comprehensive loss. Best advise. Slow down and try to miss it, but stay straight. If you hit it, so be it.

Willy D said...

No Name: It would really suck if you were necked when you sat on the chips and the bag broke.

Wooley: Post two pictures. One of your pony and one of your tail.

So far we’ve got squirrels, turtles and bullfrogs. It’s going to be a good barbeque.

Mr. M: Good info. Now I know what lie to tell.

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