Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Use Your Brain, Please!

We had the MotoGP here this weekend. As usual, someone was killed due to someone else having their head up their ass. I just don’t get it. These were not kids, although they were on very friggen fast bikes, in heavy traffic! I ride that road all the time. You don’t make a u-turn on a normal day. And how can the bikes going the other way be so inattentive that they don’t see what’s ahead of them? Speed baby! You just left the racetrack and now you’re a racer. Well I got news for you. That piece of shit you’re riding isn’t the same thing they run on the track. Not even f’ing close! Stop doing that crap in traffic. You’re killing the ones that support you!

There are some later unconfirmed reports that alcohol may be involved. Which brings up another rant. Booze and bikes don’t mix. Save it for when the ride is over. A split second of slowed reaction time is all it takes to kill your best friend.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Psychic Or Just Crazy

When news broke that the President had been assassinated on a trip abroad, the first act of the newly sworn in ex-Vice President was a promise of immediate reprisals against the terrorists responsible. The Country went into a deep state of mourning and cries for war filled every headline and newscast. Three days later it was learned that the Presidents own Party, for political reasons, had carried out the murder. The entire fabric of society was shredded within hours. All business and commerce ceased. It was now anarchy rule. The world was powerless to stop it.

In the weeks and months following the collapse of society the entire Country was thrown into total chaos. Neighborhoods banded together and barricaded the streets. Gangs of thieves roamed the cities and towns. It was now survival of the fittest and no one was exempt from the carnage. Two types of people were commonly shot on sight; any ex-politician, as they were seen as the cause of all problems that now engulfed the Country, and any known gang-banger. As one between the eyes was considered the best way to deal with dangerous animals.

“Maybe I’ll finish this story, maybe I won’t. Could be the beginning is the end. Or the end is the beginning. Could be I’m just crazy. Maybe I’m psychic and can see the future. Could be maybe I’m psychic and can see the past”. Just have a good time and don’t sweat the small stuff. It’ll all work out in the end. Gotta’ go now. I hear the black helicopters!

Friday, July 23, 2010

Tip Of The Iceberg

Bell, California. Population – 38,000 (small town).
Per capita income - $24,800 in 2008.
Chief Admin. Officer - $787,637 w/12% annual raise.
Chief-O-Police - $457,000.
City Council - $100,000 to meet once a month.

Apparently the good folks of Bell were not aware of this until someone mentioned it at a City Council meeting four days ago. Yep, you guessed it, all hell broke loose. Since then several City Fathers of Bell have resigned. With their public pensions intact of course. California Attorney General, Jerry ‘Moonbeam” Brown says he will investigate the matter. Yea, ok Jerry. Any wonder why every state, city and town is broke? I’m sure this is just the tip of the iceberg and us, the taxpayers, are a bunch of fools for allowing it.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Really Dumb Question

“I wake up in the morning and I know it’s going to be good if I stick out my elbows and they don’t pump wood”. That’s a line from a song I just heard. Good damn song. Heard it on KPIG radio. Something about that line bothered me; ‘What’s he talking about?’ Is he talking about waking up and pushing up on the inside of a wood coffin? Or, is he talking about the other kind of wood? The kind of wood that’s the scourge of women everywhere that like to sleep late when daddy likes to get up early?

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Never Said I Was PC

You want real border control? No, this isn’t PC, but it’ll work.
Build one of these every mile...

And put two of these in it.
Nothing comes across the border you don’t want coming across the border.

The tower can keep them in place while the guys in the trucks find out who they are and what they want.
Like I said, it may not be PC, but a fence and asking nice doesn’t seem to be working.