Saturday, February 28, 2009

Enough Said

If a picture is worth a thousand words, I bet you could write a thesis on this statement.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Guess The Tool Answer

Ever try to hold a small bolt or nut in place? Under a dash, behind a panel or under a bike fender? Someplace you can usually only get one finger into. It’s always a pain in the butt. This little thing does the trick. Slide the nut into the “V”, it holds the flats and keeps it from turning. Works the same for small bolts. If it has a name, I don’t know it. So I guess I’ll call it a “nutz”. But I bet there’s a better name out there somewhere.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Fabulous Blog Award

OK, I’ll play. Only because it’s raining, I’m indulging in addiction #4 and this Fabulous Blog Award was bestowed upon me by the CEO of AZ-Hole Performance, Ann of Random Thoughts. The boss speaks, I must obey.

Here are the rules:
1. You must pass it on to 5 other Fabulous bloggers in a post receiving the award.2. You must include the person that gave you the award, and link it back to them.3. You must list 5 of your Fabulous addictions in the post.4. You must copy and paste these rules in the post.

1: Sex
2: Motorcycles
3: Sex on motorcycles
4: Cigarettes
5: Coffee

Fabulous Blogs (I like all the blogs I read. These were chosen because they were not listed in another post yet):

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Guess The Tool

As the title implied this is a tool. It is not model or type specific. It can be used on any type of equipment or vehicle. It has been in my toolbox for over twenty years and is used often. There is no contest or prizes. This is part of the government “stimulus package” for your mind. Or, if your stuck in the snow, a reason to put off shoveling the driveway for a while.

OK, I’ll throw in a prize. Guess what it is and I’ll buy you the drink of your choice at Dave’s coffee shop. You have to come claim your prize, on a bike.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Sporty Goes To Washington

Now that we all know what kind of politicians we have running this country, I've decided it’s time we had a “new” kind of public official. One that puts Bikers Rights before all the dumb shit. Things like protecting the carrot nosed snowmen of West Virginia. Hey, I bet they melt come spring anyway. No matter how many millions of dollars of dry ice you shove up their butts. Or the ever popular, cute and fuzzy, three legged field mouse of California. If they had any brains, they would know it was my cat, not nature that created that species.

While sitting here this mourning with my first cup of caffeine, I heard a statement on the radio I thought was pretty far out there. It sounded so stupid; I’m not even going to check on it. While being interviewed, the new Senator from NY, don’t know her name – don’t care, said she is going to write legislation on gun trafficking because, Quote: “There is no federal legislation which addresses gun trafficking” end quote. WTF! Is she saying that there is not one federal law saying gun trafficking is a no-no? Either she’s been living under a rock, or our lawmakers are a whole lot dumber than I thought. OK, that had nothing to do with anything. Just heard it on the radio, and even half awake thought it was amusing.

So back to my candidate. This is my grass-roots effort to get the right kind of politician elected. One who puts our interest ahead of their own.

OK. I know it’s dumb and lame. But I was bored.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Husbands, Don’t Forget:

Just a frindley reminder:
Love Is Grand,
Divorce Is A Hundred Grand!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

The Final Battle II

The three Harleys stopped at the entrance to the Theodore Roosevelt Island Pumping Station, field headquarters for the final battle in the war on tyranny. Being situated on the west bank of the Potomac River, the ACF referred to it, ironically, as the “Western Whitehouse”. Luke leaned his bike onto the kickstand and waved to Ben and Tom. The two young men headed on toward the bridge to the island. They were to double and triple check the electromagnetic pulse weapons. It was crucial that the alignment not be off more than one degree.

Luke dismounted and looked at his watch. Nine o’clock. Three hours until the final card would be dealt in the highest stakes card game of his life. The thought brought back memories of the Poker Runs he and John had gone on when they were young. The Runs were often followed by all night drinking and card playing. Then, heading home as the sun was rising over the mountains. But this game was different. There was no bluffing, no folding. It was all or nothing. You either win, or you don’t go home.

He looked to the east; across the Potomac River. He saw his nephews turn off of the bridge, and onto the island. Turning to his right, he saw West Potomac Park. Fixing his gaze on the Vietnam Veterans and Korean War Memorials, he wondered how those Soldiers felt when they faced their final battle? A sudden chill went down Luke’s spine. He shook it off and headed into the pumping station.

Reaching the control room, three stories underground, he was meet by Taz and Eddie. The two men were busy modifying the controls to operate the EMP’s. Neither looked up. They were on a tight deadline. “Hey Taz, have you heard anything from the Doc about the Nuclear Power Plant yet?” Luke asked. Taz just shook his head and continued working.

Five months earlier, the ACF had disrupted all electrical power going to DC. It was quite a surprise the next day, to discover that DC still had lights and commutations. A week later, Luke had found out that in 2015; the U.S.S.A. had secretly constructed a nuclear power plant two thousand feet below the Supreme Court Building. “Smart thinking for a bunch of dumb asses” he mused, “just in case the shit ever hit the fan”. The only question now was, “What would a EMP blast do to the nuclear reactor”?

Luke had checked with the best minds on the subject he could find. All had their theories, but none could be taken as absolute fact. No one had ever aimed a EMP at a nuclear reactor before. So it was a craps shoot. Not a pleasant thought. But one he was willing to gamble on. The outcome of doing so ranged from nothing, to Armageddon. One expert said that when the EMP fries the reactor controls, it’ll cause a meltdown and explode. Or simply shut down with nothing happening. Or, it could shut down and go into stand by mode. Yet another theorized that it’s deep enough underground to be contained, regardless of the outcome.

Luke knew that they really didn’t need DC to rebuild the Nation. After all, it was just sixty-eight square miles of isolated land. Cut off from rest of the Country. It was more of a physiological tool. If Washington, D.C. were in the control of the ACF, the few remaining supporters of the U.S.S.A. would surely concede and join in the building of a new Nation. At least he hoped they would.

He checked his watch again. Ten o’clock. Two hours ‘till midnight. Time to go check on his boys. A quick word with Taz and Eddie before leaving. Taz said too “ Leave them the hell alone. They were busy. They didn’t have time to BS with the boss” They assured Luke everything was on schedule.

Back outside, his bike fired on the first kick. “That Ben sure has his Dad’s love for engines,” Luke said to himself. “Best Harley mechanic I ever had”. He reached down and kicked it into gear. Luke gave a quick salute to the Washington Monument, silhouetted in the moonlight, and headed off in search of a Nation waiting to be rebuilt.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Picture Du Jour

Want to know how I really feel?

Sunday, February 8, 2009

The Final Battle

Ben and Tom sat by the mouth of the cave and listened intently to their Uncle Luke. The time to attack the last stronghold of the outlawed U.S.S.A. government was close. Washington DC would fall tonight. Over one million soldiers of the Armed Citizen Force were outside the barricaded city waiting for Luke’s order…

Ben, now 21 years old, and Tom 18, barely remember life before the cave. Fifteen years earlier Luke and his brother John had started the ACF. When John, the boys’ father, was killed in a raid on Ft. Dix, thirteen years ago, Luke raised them as his own, and as Lieutenants in the War on Tyranny. The last ten years living in the cave.

Luke asked if the electromagnetic pulse weapons were in place. Ready to take out all commutations and electronics within DC. The young men nodded in agreement. Everything was in place and victory was assured. Tom looked up and spoke, “Uncle Luke, I’ve heard many stories over the years about how this started. But you’ve never told us how you and our Dad got involved. Can you tell us now, before we face the final battle?

Luke had been prepared for this question. He didn’t want to tell them until they were ready. Until “they” asked. He reached into his rucksack for his Winslow pipe. Packed it with his favorite tobacco and took long drags. He stared at the sky for several minutes putting his thoughts in order.

“Boys”, Luke began. “When the government sold GM, Dodge and Ford to Japan, most people accepted the fact that Toyota was the only auto you could buy anymore. In 2011 when Harley took a loan from the government things heated up a little. But assurances were made that the Motor Co. would continue as normal. Weeks later, when news surfaced that the Congress had officially changed the name of our country to the “United Socialist States of America” and had sold Harley Davidson to a Chinese company, things really got hot”.

Luke relit his pipe and continued. “Within a week there were riots and looting at every Harley dealer in the country. Law enforcement was powerless to stop it. I still think they didn’t want to stop it. They were just as mad as we were. That’s when your father and I, along with our HOG chapter formed the “Armed Citizen Force”. Our objective was to take out any Chinese owned company on American soil. Before long we had HOG chapters across the country joining”.

The sun was beginning to fade behind the mountain. Luke looked at his nephews and grinned. They would be part of history. “When they deployed the National Guard to stop us, that was their biggest mistake. The government had no idea how many “Soldiers for Harley” there were in the backwoods and bayous of America. Most of them were secretly smuggling weapons to the ACF. One by one, military installations were controlled by the ACF. Our numbers grew daily. A lot of U.S.S.A officials tried to flee overseas. Most never made it. That brings us to the here and now boys. The day we restore the country your father loved and died for”.

It was now completely dark outside. The three of them packed their gear on three rusted but freshly serviced Harleys and headed down the mountain. The lights of DC glowed like demon candles as they approached the onetime Capital that was now a fortress. The soldiers of the Armed Citizen Force stood in silence and saluted as they rode past. The time was now. Tonight they would give birth to a new Nation.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Ravings Of A Lunatic

I have no idea where this is going. I’m just trying to make sense of all the bad news being thrown at us everywhere you turn. TV, radio, Internet, newspapers and everyone you talk to. The sky’s falling and the country’s going down the toilet. Harley’s cutting jobs. Caterpillar cutting 20,000 jobs. One of my best customers, that until last year had 42 employees and did 1.5 million a year with us, now has 9 employees, and is 120 days past due on $80,000. Small, medium and large companies going under every day. 500,000 jobs being cut every month. Sounds like the Soviet Union before they went ape shit. We have a bunch of people in DC who think they can fix everything. I’m not sure if any of them are economics professors or not, but I’m positive every one of them is a lawyer. And I’m pretty darn sure it’s the same bunch of dumb shits that got us in this to start with. I wouldn’t go drinking any of their kool-aid just yet. I don’t think any of them has a clue. Right now I think all those dummies in DC are running scared. Scared that if they don’t fix their screw-up, there’ll be armed rioters pulling them out of their plush offices, and beating the fucking shit out of them! With half a million jobs being lost a month, and IRA’s and 401K’s getting looted by corporate greed, I wonder just how long it’ll be before roving bands of very armed, very pissed off people start “visiting” corporate and government offices to get their pound of flesh. People are getting really pissed. What’s worse is people are getting scared. And scared people are very unpredictable. It wouldn’t take much for the shit to hit the fan. Just a small incident. Totally insignificant in itself. But enough to push people over the edge. DC would fall pretty quick. The Police and National Guard wouldn’t be able to stop it. Most police are getting screwed over just like everyone else. They might just join in. The National Guard? They did take an oath to protect this country from all enemies, foreign and “domestic”. Care to place a bet on how many citizens are starting to consider most of the DC scumbags domestic enemies? This could happen, it could not happen. Only time will tell. But at the rate that bad shit’s happening right now, shit, I aint got a clue either.