A Political Question

Yes, I know that some people don’t like politics and won't comment on them. That’s fine. Just vote when it’s your turn. The question of the 2012 election, which is fast approaching, seems to be shaping up as a pretty darn important one. This could be the one that literary means sink or swim for the USA.

Everyone knows that I very rarely delve into politics. I’m an average citizen. I’m just not smart enough to know what’s good for our Country. I don’t have the criminal background to be a public official.

I just watched Greta Van Susteren interview Sarah Palin. In my opinion Sarah is one smart lady, compared to the current occupant of the Oval Office. So, if she decides to run in 2012, that would make it Palin v Pbo. Question: Who do you think would win that election? I think Palin would kick his ass and send him back to Chicago with his tail between his legs.

What Are You Doing New Years Eve?

Meow meow purr meow purr hiss hiss meow purr purr meow?

Translation: Romeo Oh Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?

Should Of Posted This Yesterday But I Got Lazy

Ya’ know, sometimes it’s just the little things that make you think. Take sitting here in the garage with a non-filter and a cup of Rollick’s finest. It’s making me think of last night – Christmas Eve. When I was sitting on my ass in this same chair last night, I had one of the best nights I’ve had in a long time. And I didn’t really do shit.

Bro. Dave had to be brewing at 0: dark thirty. So I figured I’d brave the cold and ride down to his shop. A coffeehouse is damn nice destation when your going on a dark, damp, cold ride. Hung out and bull shited with Viking most of the morning. When he got off work we took a ride over to see Wolf and wish him the merriest of seasons. He threatened to get a restraining order if we ever came back. Love ya’ Wolf, you’re a good Brother. Everybody said their best Merry F’ing Christmas and goes their separate way to take care of last minute details.

So I get home X-Mas Eve and there’s not really anything to do. The daughter is gone to a party, just the wife and I left to fend for ourselves. What to do what to do. A quick trip outside to abide is some local agriculture. Then we just sat in the semi-dark garage, the kitchen light glowing through the door. I put on Arlo Guthrie’s “Alice’s Restaurant” and we sat there staring at the bikes and listening to 40 year old tunes. And it was a damn fine time. It also made me think. The economy is in the toilet; I’ve got no idea how secure my job is and all that other negative crap. But then all that faded and the positive took over. I realized I’ve got some great people in my life.

Even with all the break-ups going on it’s still possible to be in love after 20 years. I wouldn’t trade my wife for anything. Becky and Dave help keep me sane, although I might trade Dave for a nice Panhead, but that’s a whole different story. All the folks out there in Blogersville, the ones I’ve met, Ann, mq01, Big D, Arizona Harley Dude, Biker Chickz, you guys hold a special place in my life. All of you I haven’t met, yet, you help me keep things in perspective. There’s a lot of wisdom floating around out there. Just wanted to let all of you know that I appreciate you being part of my life. You help restore my faith in humankind.

Now jump on your bike and terrorize the neighborhood! We wouldn’t want the “public” to get the idea that we’re nice people.

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Originally I was just going to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and leave it at that. I guess I can still do that; Merry Christmas everyone!

But then the voices in my head started talking and no matter how much kool-aid I drank they wouldn’t shut up. And since Political Correctness isn’t in my vocabulary, I couldn’t resist taking a jab at some of my favorite people. Love them or hate them, you have to admire them for being consistent. Consistently not listing to what the people that pay their salaries say.


T’was the night before Health Care and all through the House,
Nancy was whoring like a queer little mouse.

The Senate was snug in their warm office beds,
While visions of botox danced in their heads.

Her stockings were hung from her shoulder with care,
In hopes that a new vote would be in her rear.

She wandered the Halls looking for votes,
She found one outside taking a toke.

She gagged and she swallowed she spit and she swished,
She now had the vote right there in her fist.

The deal is now done she proclaimed with a grin,
As the last vote she needed ran down her chin.


***Any similarities to any persons living or dead are purely accidental***
Merry Christmas to all and to all a Good Fight. Ho Ho Ho!

Back on the government “watch list” I go.

Just A Observation

For the last week I’ve been paying close attention to the ass-end of cars. No, it’s not a fetish. But hey, some of those little imports do have cute rear-ends. I’ve been looking for something. A few months ago they were all over the place. Now I can’t find a single one. It actually gives me a warm fuzzy feeling that I can’t find any. What I’m been looking for is a f’ing obama bumper sticker.

Those things were on every other car a while back. Now I don’t see any. I’ve concluded that there are only two reasons for this. Reason 1: Everyone that voted for (choke) obama participated in the cash for clunkers and now has a new car. But I don’t think auto sales are up that much, so that’s probably not the real reason. Reason 2: (The more likely one) Everyone that voted for (just threw up in my mouth) obama is so damn embarrassed to have anyone know it that they tore the stupid thing off. How’s that hope and change working for you now?

Interview With Pbo

Someone sent me this interview. They had no idea where it came from. But after a long and exhaustive search I think I found the story behind it. Seems that the interviewee was just walking down the street one day and some dude in his garage asked if he could interview him. So out comes the microphone and it’s on. Because of all the black helicopters buzzing around and the guys in dark suits with sunglasses, the disguise came out also.

The audio portion was broadcast about a month ago on radio station WSHIT “the brown spot on your dial”. It was only aired once, and then the station was mysteriously flushed away. Gone, right down the drain. Never to be seen again. But I managed to get not only the audio but also the video. So this is a world premier of the interview they didn’t want you to see.

***Disclaimer*** This is a parody, political satire, you know, part of my 1st Amendment Rights. But just incase someone doesn’t agree with the U.S. Constitution I have a solution. Go to the nearest U.S. border crossing, cross the border and burn your passport. Bye Bye.

Williams, AZ - A Little Late

These were hanging from the ceiling of the bar in Williams, AZ

Yes, I know this is late. I started it on July 11th. But hey, I just found a math test from the 8th grade I never finished. I smell a GED in my future!

OK. So you all know we took a trip to AZ. Why, I don’t know. Crap, after two hundred miles, my wife decides her hinny hurts and we have to call her mommy to pick her up. Maybe I should have put the rear seat on? The fender didn’t look that hard. Then, after nineteen hours on the road I get to sleep on a plywood bed with things crawling on me. I think there are critters that live in that mountain air, I saw it in a movie once it must be true. The next morning I’m sitting outside enjoying a cup of rancid coffee and a non-filter, just sitting there, minding my own damn business, when these people in leather start shouting my name and start trying to hug me. Boy, I’ll tell ya’, those people in AZ are pretty darn friendly. Don’t they know that if you do that in Alabama you’re considered married! They said their names were Ann, Big D and Arizona Harley Dude. I asked for ID but nobody had one. Likely story. I still think they were spies from the California Air Resource Board sent to Arizona to try and screw up that State also.

The next thing I know I’m being dragged into some two hundred year old building they said was a restaurant. I think the waitress built the place, but she had a mind like a steel trap. She took everyone’s order without a notepad and got everything perfect. Now I’m being forced to eat some strange redneck food while listening to a discussion about the proper use of the word penis. Hell, maybe I did get married that morning. I know I heard Dueling Banjos playing on the eight-track.

Shortly after that I found myself with a whole bunch of those leather-clad types on bikes, riding from one end of town and back again. It was like some sort of circus freak-show. I could see the towns-folks pointing and warning their children. You could hear them: “See that one with the beard and tattoos? Stay away from him! He’s trouble”. The sign on the hardware store said there was a “this weekend only” sale on “pitchforks”. I wonder why. I kept a close eye on them.

After all the dirty looks from the locals I spent the afternoon following around a 2-speed Sporty. The two speeds were 0 and friggen 90. Nothing in between. Anybody who doubts that a Sporty packing two-up can’t leave a Big Twin in the dust; well shit happens. After a day of riding in the cold, rain, heat and everything in-between, we wound up at a local shop for some pretty darn good road-kill to put in our bellies. Possum, maybe beaver or squirrel. Don’t matter, it was good.

Later on we went to one of those places folks go to and play grab-ass. They have beer, liquor and other mind altering stuff. You best keep an eye on you ass if you go to one of these establishments, someone might grab it and not give it back. But hey, if you think your ass is too big and you want to lose some, sign up for the frequent ass-grabber plan. After a few hours of grab-ass watching and more local animal abuse, it was back to my plywood Sorta Perfect Sleeper.

The next morning was some leftover possum and a trip from Williams to Phoenix for a overnight before heading back to CA. It was pretty uneventful except that you ride through some of the most spectacular scenery on earth. When we got close to Phoenix and traffic was starting to back-up Ann warned us that we “could not” split lanes in AZ. So being good law-abiding citizens we respected the law and “did not” split lanes. We rode down the shoulder to our exit.

Eventually we found our way to Big D’s garage. Full of bike, parts and tools. I felt right at home. The fact that Ann, Big D, AHD, the kids and the folks from B.A.C.A. that stopped by were all down-home genuine folks didn’t hurt either. Some of the best people you would ever want to meet if you ever get over that way. The rest of the nights activities are a little fuzzy, so rather than make stuff up I’ll leave it out. I will say this: “Big D, if you ever run for public office I’ll vote for you”. Even though you probably wouldn’t win because most people won’t accept the truth.

The next days ride back to CA sucked (damn helmet law!). Don’t get me wrong. It was a good ride with great friends, B.B. and Dave, but you’re ridding away from something you don’t want to end. While the saying “ There’s always next year” is true, it took me so long to get of my ass and finish writing this that “next year” is only a few months away.